bewwbs:

how to get girls to like you:

  1. compliment their eyebrows
  2. eat them out

I’m a girl and this 100% effective.

(Source: a-greek-goddess, via pizza)

despairkomaeda:

earthnation:

oomshi:

part time humor blogger part time selfie blogger

more like full time humor blogger because your selfies are a joke

image

(via pizza)

opentheairforfreshwindows:

brave-fart:

brave-fart:

brave-fart:

brave-fart:

brave-fart:

brave-fart:

brave-fart:

brave-fart:

did you hear about the italian chef who died?

he pasta way

he just ran out of thyme

here today, gone tomato

his wife is still upset, cheese still not over it

we never sausage a tragedy coming

ashes to ashes, crust to crust

there’s just not mushroom for italian chefs in today’s world

spaghetti

Thanks for your contribution.

(Source: sofunnyimcryan, via pizza)

Heres to hoping that someone will buy me my amazon wish list.

ostracizedpoodle:

I don’t need alcohol to make bad decisions

(via pizza)

Tumblr help me. I’m falling apart.